Encountering Divine Mercy Through Confession
By Gabby Lynch
There was a time in my early twenties that I refused the Sacraments. I felt unworthy and there was much pain associated with my past. Sexual abuse and molestation created a block between Jesus and me. It was I who was blocking Jesus. I was ashamed. I thought He, the Divine Lover, did not really love me and I didn't deserve his love. How incredibly wrong was I.
The first time I opened up to the Lord after my latent behavior was in the confessional in Redwood City, California. I hadn't received the Sacrament of Reconcilation in years, and the Holy Spirit moved me to just go and get it done. I had put off forgiveness for a long time. I went and sat face to face with the priest and poured out my heart and soul. I wept and to my surprise, so did the priest! He had removed his glasses to wipe his tears and said "don't let me forget my glasses," with a smile as he guided me back into the warm, peaceful and loving embrace of the Holy Spirit. I was healed instantly and my sins were forgiven, but I had much work to do.
From that point on, my heart changed and I began to see the world through new eyes. "The lamp of the body is the eye. When your eye is sound, then your whole body is filled with light, but when it is bad, then your body is in darkness." Luke 11:34. We begin to see how much the Lord God loves each one of us through his compassion in the beautiful Sacrament of Reconcilation. Could I have asked Jesus to forgive my sins in the quiet of my room, absolutely and I still do. However, I find a time to go to confession because I know the truth behind our priests vocations: to be servants of Christ and stewards of the mysteries of God (1 Corinthians 4:1). They act as Christ on earth. It is quite humbling to pour out your soul's wounds to another human being especially one who represents true love and oh, how freeing it is! Through humility, our love grows. Through adversity, our faith is strengthened.
Since my confession in California, I have gone many more times and no surprise, I am made new each time and beautiful joy shines forth as a witness to this Divine Mercy. We are to be a light for Christ. If you are searching for truth, for healing, for true love, be not afraid of the Sacraments for they are the remedy our souls thirst for. Saint Teresa of Avila once said "You pay God a compliment by asking great things of Him." So go on, ask for healing, for forgiveness, for mercy, for peace. This world can not give it to you. As hard as we may try to solve our own infirmities, it will never come to fruition. "I have told you this so you might have peace in me. In the world you will have trouble, but take courage, I have conquered the world." (John 16:33)
May the peace of God fill you and give you courage to receive the Sacrament of Reconciliation. And as for the priest's glasses, I totally forgot, but I'm pretty sure he knew where he left them.
