The Beginner's Guide to Being a Godparent
By Katie Tejada
Tears filled my eyes and my heart squeezed with emotion the first time a dear friend asked me to be their almost-born baby’s godmother.
Who am I kidding? I’ve gotten teary and been overwhelmed with joy, humility, and gratitude every time I’ve been asked to be a godmother…and every time I asked the same of someone else for my children, for that matter!
Of all of the beautiful relationships in life, there is something about the one between a godparent and godchild that is especially tender. Unlike family relationships, it’s a bond that doesn’t depend on biology. Oftentimes aunts, uncles, and cousins serve as godparents, but family friends or respected members of one’s faith community can fill the role just as well.
It’s a relationship that is truly unique to a child and their godparents. I know that each of my children loves having their very own godmother and godfather—they don’t share them with one another like they do their grandparents!—and I have a special spot in my heart for my godchildren.
Finally, the godchild-godparent relationship is one that is centered entirely on faith. The explicit purpose of godparents, as stated in the Baptism liturgy itself, is to help the child’s parents in raising their son or daughter in the faith. It’s an honor, as well as a tremendously serious obligation.
Even if you are joyful and touched that you were asked to be a godparent, this level of obligation can, at times, feel daunting. So if you find yourself overwhelmed or uncertain as to what this relationship should look like––look no further. Here is the Catholic beginner’s guide to being a godparent.
Be Present for Your Godchild
Your role as a godparent begins on the day of your godchild’s baptism, when you join their parents at the baptismal font, make a promise to help the parents in their duty as Christian parents, and recite the baptismal promises on behalf of the baby. This may feel like the most significant aspect of your life as a godparent, but it’s only the beginning.
As your godchild ages, be there for them. Many godparents choose to give their godchildren Christmas and birthday gifts (if you go this route, think about giving faith-inspired gifts, like a Nativity for Christmas or a piece of religious art), or you might make a habit of having seasonal or annual one-on-one dates with your godchild.
If your respective locations don’t allow for in-person connection, consider writing your godchild a letter every year on their Baptismal anniversary or birthday, letting them know just how loved they are, and maybe including a saint quote or Scripture passage. The specifics of how you choose to be involved in your godchild’s life matter less than your consistent and positive presence.
Support Your Godchild’s Parents
When becoming a godparent, it’s easy to forget that you’ve made a promise to the parents of your godchild as much as to the child themselves. One of the best ways to support your godchild’s parents is to ask them what you can do to nourish and encourage their child’s faith development. As a parent, I’m constantly considering how my children are progressing in their spiritual lives. Are they growing in virtue? Are they struggling to keep a certain commandment? Do they show age-appropriate levels of devotion and interest in prayer, Mass, and Sacred Scripture?
Knowing my efforts and concerns as a parent, I make it a point to check in at least once a year with my godchildren’s parents to find out if there is a particular area in which I can assist them in raising faithful children. After all, it takes a village, right? A few times, my friends have asked me to talk to their kids about specific topics but many times this check-in simply turns into a needed moment of affirmation in my friends’ parenting. The boost of confidence from someone from the outside, who knows and loves their children, can be a real source of encouragement.
Look for Creative Ways to Share the Story of Our Faith
One of the best parts of being a godparent is that you get to have a close relationship with a baby (later a toddler, child, adolescent, teen, and young adult) without having to deal with the most tedious aspects of being the actual parent. As a godparent, I’ve never once been called upon to wake up at 3 a.m. to feed a wailing baby or to insist that something more respectable is worn for school pictures. I take full advantage of this unique role and lean into the purely joyful relationship.
One of the ways I do this is by dreaming up creative ways to share the story of our faith. For instance, last year one of my godsons and I chose tags off our parish’s giving tree and then went shopping for a family in need. We talked about the Christian call to charity and the true meaning of Christmas…and we got to split a tub of popcorn while we perused the Target toy aisles together! For another goddaughter, I gifted her a set of rosary beads that matches my own, and we agreed to pray the rosary together—over the phone—the first Friday of every month.
Pray for Your Godchild and Their Parents
Last but certainly not least, keep your godchild and their parents in your regular prayers. You can do this in whatever way suits you: light a votive candle for them at your church, call their face to mind as you say a decade of the rosary, mark their baptismal anniversary or their patron saint’s feast day on your calendar and go to daily Mass that day with them in mind, or name them in your nighttime prayers. How you pray for your godchildren doesn’t matter, so long as you do it!
Being a Catholic godparent is an honor and an obligation. The godparent-godchild relationship is one that has the potential to be life-giving and transformative for both the child and the parent, and it reaches its fullness—with God’s help—when you fully embrace your role. Welcome the duty and the joy. You won’t regret it!
Author Bio: Katie Tejada is a writer, editor, and former HR professional. She works with a variety of Catholic businesses, like House of Joppa, and often covers developments in decor, interiors, and events. She also enjoys writing about parenthood and faith.
