Carolyn's Wedding Part III: A Glimpse of Heaven
It’s funny how I almost wanted to correct people when they reminded me, “Your wedding is just a day. Your focus should be on preparing for your lifelong marriage, not your wedding day.” I mean, I get what they were trying to get at. It’s so easy to pour all of your time and energy and thoughts and prayers into that one day and lose sight of the horizon beyond that, which is, you know, forever. More so, it’s easy to put so much of that focus into your reception and not even your Mass since the Mass is more limited in what you can choose to do.
But I couldn’t ignore the sweet pressure of anticipation in knowing that this one day could leave a lasting impact on our guests. I almost viewed it as an art exhibit: it’s our one shot to bring this group of people together and to introduce many of them for the first time to the sacrament of marriage and the Eucharist. It was a pilgrimage to some, an invitation to others, a momentous moment for our families, an occasion of healing to a few, and it was…sacred.
You should focus a lot on your wedding day, but not in a way that drowns out the life that proceeds it.
And when that day did come to a close, I was so deliriously happy and proud and grateful at giving it all we had. I probably spent way too much time over the playlist and fretted too much about some things being just so, but I was happy I took the time to focus on details like heartfelt gifts and being intentional in various ways.
Yes, it was just a day. Maybe it wasn’t even the best day of my life, but I’m so happy with how our marriage began on that victorious day. And now, just two weeks married, I can say with such peaceful confidence: it was a dream and everything I could have hoped for. And that seemed to be my biggest takeaway from my wedding day and my honeymoon: the importance of dreaming.
Some of us haven’t necessarily dreamed of our wedding day for years, but that doesn’t mean it won’t feel like a surreal dream. Seeing Dad’s face flush with emotion multiple times that weekend, dancing under colorful confetti raining from the sky with nuns and friends and my little nieces and nephews, joy that echoed and rippled across the hundreds present, my mother beaming as she helped me step into the dress she wore over 30 years ago, and above all, walking towards Peter down the aisle—the man who was set apart for me before the world was made. It was him. It was always meant to be his hands that would clutch a crucifix with me as we vowed to love and love and love. And as I broke down during those vows, particularly during the words “in sickness and health” and feeling my brother-in-law’s absence, Peter turned the crucifix to face me and from there, I drew strength.
Maybe it wasn’t so much a dream but a glimpse of heaven on earth.
And that love we felt on that day will carry us until kingdom come, as we begin to work together to not just get each other and as many souls as possible to heaven, but to bring heaven to earth. Our honeymoon was equally as surreal.
I’ve dreamt of staying in this chateau for years, and Peter dreamt about visiting the Matisse chapel for a long time too. Turns out both were just ten minutes apart, in a way that only God could design. Our honeymoon was straight up God telling us “I see the dreams in your heart and I want to fulfill them all. Now keep dreaming and dream even BIGGER!” We zip lined and luged and hiked in the Alps and drank wine with strangers on the Mediterranean and wandered the streets of a medieval village known for housing and inspiring artists like Picasso, Matisse and Chagall... But coming home with my dear husband and beginning our little simple life together is what I’ve dreamt about most!
People will have a lot of advice to share about your wedding day and the first few months of your marriage, and I suppose this article is even my own piece of advice, but in conclusion, I really just want to say open your heart to all the beauty and wonder that the Lord has prepared for you as you begin your vocation. He is so good, and I was reminded that the Lord doesn’t always ask us hard things or take away things or challenges us, but sometimes He loves to spoil us. He’s a giver, and as I began my vocation I was showered in that eternal Love and reminded how glorious He truly is.
